I really hate to say it but... Gabe is back in diapers. He started out so well - that is what is so frustrating! He can do it but the bottom line is: he won't! He doesn't want to. At first he did great - almost perfect from day one. I was so happy and so was he! But pretty soon he wouldn't go #2 on the potty... not at all, not for anything in the world! And I tried all kinds of fun incentives, treats and bribes. Gabe would get really enthusiastic about it all but when it came down to it... no way! Then in the last week he started having more and more #1 accidents as well until I was doing 2-3 batches of laundry a day and cleaning up messes (some of which you really don't want to hear about) several times a day as well. It was really discouraging to see him regress and pretty much refuse to do it even though he had been successful and I knew he was capable.
This morning we didn't start off very well - 3 fresh pair of undies before 6am - but I was still optimistic and determined to see it out. Well, by 6pm he had had 4 more #1 "accidents" during the day( I don't even count #2), a record high for him and I finally admitted defeat and put a diaper back on. He didn't seem to care at all. So after 2 weeks and 2 days, we are throwing in the towel. I can't tell you how disappointed I am! Not in my little boy or in myself either since I know we both did our best, but I'm just very discouraged about all the time and energy wasted these past 2 weeks. And also I feel guilty and worried that I've really screwed things up for him and that he'll be so confused about the whole thing now. He informed me he had had an accident while I was putting him to bed and wanted me fix it... what am I supposed to say? "Oh that's ok, honey, just pee your pants now that you have a diaper again. I know I have ingrained in your brain that we go on the potty but just forget I said that!" And I know he is going to keep waking me in the night crying that either he needs to go potty or that he had an accident.
What would I give to be able to go back to the bliss of easy life with a diapered 2 year old that would play in his bed until 7am and was so chill and relaxed. I wish I could go back and make the decision again- to just wait until he was 3... but the thing is I knew he could do it and I was right, he could and did. But I didn't consider if he would want to! Now I realize what a mistake that is. He has his own little personality and when push comes to shove, you can't force a child to potty train! (Not that I tried to force him but you know what I mean!) If things were different in life right now (like we weren't moving ourselves in 5 days and I wasn't over 7 months pregnant) I really would stick to it and keep working. But honestly, I just don't have the time or the emotional and physical reserves to continue this way!! So even though I envisioned a perfect situation of a potty trained Gabe when the baby came... I have been reminded again that life isn't perfect and you really can't plan it all out. Everything involving toddlers is unpredictable!
I don't often vent on our blog so thanks for indulging me! I have to end by saying that even though I'm really discouraged about the whole thing, I'm not disappointed in Gabe at all. He is the funniest, sweetest little guy. He is my buddy every day, all day. He constantly amazes me with how intelligent he is - the things he says and remembers are incredible and often hilarious! And he has the most tender and sensitive spirit. I couldn't love him more or be more proud of him. I'm just sorry I put us both through this ordeal because I hate to expose him to failure of any sort. Hindsight really is 20/20 though and in the long run it doesn't matter! Eric reminded me tonight that I did my very best and there's no manual for parenting (which made me feel better for some reason but also made me realize that there are a lot more experiences like this for me in the future... oh boy!) Well, all we can do is live and learn, I guess! :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
9 comments:
Can I just say that we had the same experience with Callie!!! She was doing great but then just refused to do it. Finally I put her back in diapers and felt like such a failure. Five months later she hauled out her potty and her potty book. She asked me to read her book. Then she ripped off her diaper, told me she was done with them, and went potty. Four accidents later we were potty trained. No incentives, and little encouragement by me. She was just ready. His time will come. I hope this helps!
Brittany,
Don't worry! I did the same thing with Brady! Darn it, it just was not time for him! When we tried again right before he turned 3 it went perfectly!!! I LOVE that you are always so sweet and positive about him. It makes me smile. I can tell you are such a great mom for him.. It will work out and he will not even be phased by this "practice run"!!!
Oh, what a bummer. I am so sorry. I know exactly what you mean about feeling like the past two weeks was a huge ordeal that could have just never taken place. That's what potty training is all about, I guess!
Now I am even MORE set (than I already was) that I will not worry about potty training until the week of my kids' third birthday. Seriously, I don't think anyone can talk me out of it, unless it was my child begging me to use the toilet of course. :)
One more thing - don't feel too disappointed that it didn't work out before the baby came. I have heard way too many stories of mothers trying to get their toddler potty trained before the baby comes, only to have a completely potty trained toddler revert back to not using the potty at all once the baby arrives. Having a new baby is a big change in their lives and it doesn't ever surprise me that toddlers will sometimes react that way. So, maybe it was bound to happen now or then. :) (I'm just trying to make you feel better - if it had been successful I would have given kudos to you for sure, and been very optimistic of course!) :)
Hey girl,
I haven't blogged lately. It's nice to catch up and see what you have been up too. I can't believe you tried to potty trained. Dylan seems very interested and even though he is two this week, I am not ready for that little adventure just yet. I am sure Gabe will get there someday. I promise, he won't go to kindergarten with diapers.
Good luck with the move and I am so excited for the new baby. Can't wait to see pictures ont he blog.
Britt-Don't worry, I do remember the same exact thing happening with his daddy!There is no perfect age, just like when they walk! When Gabe is ready he will tell you, and then it will be EASY. I am so grateful my grandbaby has such a sweet, wonderful mother! You are way more patient than I was! We love you all!
Grandma Cheryl
Same thing happened with Josh. I tried again 2 months later and that time it stuck. No regrets. He'll get it VERY soon.
You are such a sweetheart, Baba. I love you. I'm sorry for all the time spent and the disappointment, but I'll bet it will be really easy when you try again. Potty training is a hassle, that's for sure!
XOXOX Mom
It is so funny to read your post, b/c I am going through the same exact thing with Jonah (and he already is 3!) As soon as he earned his big prize for going #2 on the potty, he told me he didn't ever want to go again. And he hasn't. It is encouraging to read all of these posts -- maybe I won't have to pay Jonah's kindergarten teacher to change his diapers!
Love you,
Jill
For some reason, Cheryl's comment kind of choked me up. I think because I read your post thinking the same thing... you are the best mom! Sweet, patient, fun and you take life in stride. I miss you so much right now! I wish I could just drive over and spend the day helping you unpack and get organized... or shopping for cute little baby girl stuff. I love yoU!
Post a Comment